Avoir un chéri-chéri, pour la Saint Valentin c’est vraiment le bonheur La Saint Valentin est l’occasion parfaite pour lui déclarer sa flamme, .
Et là, c’est le drame ! Comment rédige-t-on ce formidable élan du coeur ? No soucy mes poussins, le web nous vient en aide, puisqu’il propose des générateurs de lettre de la Saint Valentin, dont mon chouchou celui de CrazyHoroscopes.
Les étapes nécessaires à la missive enflamée, sont les suivantes : on se rend sur ce lien. On rempli bien les petites cases et les questionnaires à choix multiples (sans accent s’il vous plait, ce site est “Oh so british”), et le tour est joué :
« My dearest Cheri Cheri,
Upon this canvas I shall spill my soul’s inner-most desires for you, and upon my chest I carve your name with the dagger of carnal desire, so the world may knoweth that only you lie within my heart.
Should a thousand angels tear out my heart with the forsaken instrument of death, it would still beat for you a million times and call your name in the night. I just cannot explain the passion inside which burns for you.
What manner of creature can resist those gorgeous green eyes of yours which remind me of tiny sparkling green M&Ms inside your eyeballs. There have been many occasions where I’ve felt like picking them out with a plastic spoon and eating them, but I don’t think you’d like that. Maybe its because you plan to eat them yourself. Who knows.
I admire the way you brush your lovely brown hair, and its funny when your hair collects static and stands on end. It reminds me of a cute little hedgehog, or even one of those little troll dolls!
I really love our time together when we go to the local cafe, for a cup of something wonderful and some great stimulating conversation. Its really funny how you always humiliate yourself by purchasing the most bitter thing on the menu and then trying to impress me by pretending you are cultured and you drink it all the time. Its so cute watching your face scrunch up like a cute little tortoise!
Words alone cannot express how unique my love is for you. I love you, and you only, I swear that to you my love ….OK, perhaps I got a little too excited cos I also love my mobile phone which I always love using to send you txt flirts with. Remember that time I sent you a rude txt flirt and I accidentally sent it to your Father?! And remember that time we were making out, and I had to leave in a hurry so I threw the phone at you, and said “Set it to vibrate and finish yourself off!”? You see love, it does have its other uses, but we’re not talking about that right now! (Besides the fact that I just mentioned it now, but that part was allowed because the context was a little bit relevant)
I really must tell you though, I absolutely adore your gorgeous eyes! I think if God created something truly amazing, then its definitely gotta be your eyes! I know some people say the same thing about horses and giraffes, but I think your eyes exceeds anything else!
Anyway darling, I must depart now. I really can’t wait to see you again, especially if you are gonna be wearing sexy Black underwear for me! Go on, surprise me! I’ve often wondered what you would look like wearing those, and many a nights have gone by where I would sit and fantasise about you wearing Black underwear and I would have no need to watch music videos any more.
I wish you the happiest Valentines Day ever, my dear sweet lover, with every fiery spark of carnal desire within my burning soul which cries tears of blood for you, with every second that passes without you!
Forever and eternally yours and yours only,
Ok, Chéri-Chéri, doit être un peu anglophone. C’est normal, on veut un homme au top !